Rainbows: It Ain’t Just About Skittles Anymore

rainbowLast week, you couldn’t miss the whole landmark ruling about gay marriage that took the country by storm. Most of my friends had a lot to say for / against the whole thing. Facebook was dotted with rainbow colors across profile pictures, and you couldn’t miss the hot debates some Christians (and non-religious homophobes without the sense God gave a rock) ended up in. It was also noted that I remained neutral. Like the whole Caitlyn Jenner thing, I don’t make snap judgements based on the flow of opinions going on around me. I have to think about things first, before I decide if I want to chime in or not, and what I want to say. I’ve seen some of my fellow Christians get slaughtered while others took a hard stand, got attacked, back-tracked, and are now being treated worse than before they caved. Yikes.

Here’s my take on all of this.

I don’t give a crap if someone is gay or not. For the non-Christians, their only sin is rejecting the Lord, and the gay thing doesn’t come into play at all. For the Christian gays, that is between them and God. I love who I love, and if I only loved people who were living lives in line with God, I would be the loneliest hypocrite on the face of the earth.

My feelings about this are well documented. I wrote about my stepson Cole, who has had more tragedy in his one young life than anyone else I’ve ever met,  being gay (How Important is Sin When You Love Somebody?, #ThisBlogWantsToStopTalkingAboutCaitlynJennerSalvation Deal-Breakers), and why I felt like the church has erred big time when it comes to people who struggle with this particular sin.

And yes. I do think it is a sin. But, like all the rest of the ways to mess up the Law, including my own particularly foul – flavored set of sins, that is between God and His child.Unless you are that child, butt out.

IMG_0715 I have no part in any of it, except to love all men the way He loves me, as best I can. I live in a glass house the size of Texas.It is difficult enough for me to make it through a day without judging, gossiping, losing my temper, worrying, lashing out the list goes on and on… no need to add judging the status of people’s eternal destinations to it when I can’t even get a good grip on my own bullshit.

It is not a sign of cowardice or shame or guilt to refrain from joining in with the multitude of voices all shouting opinions when things like this start flooding the media. I’m not ashamed of the Lord, His statutes, or my adherence to them. I know in some circles I’m considered simple, stupid, fanatical, un-hip, archaic, a hate-monger, and a million other derogatory things. While it is true, I can be un-hip (you should see me dance), the rest is just not true. I’m not simple or stupid. I’m not fanatical or have any desire to spread hatred.

quotes106The real mind-twister is, I’m none of these things people often accuse me of,  because of my belief in the Lord. My natural tendencies as a human being are to be judgmental about people different from me; to be arrogant about my own opinions, and deride those that don’t match mine. To think I am more valuable than someone with a lower IQ than me, or who makes less money. I can be an angry person, even now, and my PBOL days showed all too clearly how quickly I’ll throw down in a bar fight over nothing important, spreading my own kind of hate and anger about life in general. I’m woefully human.

I was a fool that was saved out of my foolishness by the grace of Someone who had mercy on me. It would be ridiculous of me, nothing more than a court jester, to assume I have any authority to rule over anyone else’s life, and that includes gay people.


I don’t make a big deal about my opinions about gays, or my love for those in my life who are gay, or my religious stances about hot button topics, not out of cowardice or shame, but because I see people as defined by so much more than whether they are gay or not gay; whether they are Christians or not Christians; whether they are boys, or girls, or both, or neither. I don’t care. I think Jesus sees us as complicated, understands what we are capable of and what we are not, and when it’s time to address something in ourselves that needs to be changed, and when it is not time.

I love the gay people in my life, not because I want the world to see me waving my rainbow flag, but because they are people who 8d4711bb96ea9d6bcc4ff2b5ad398dc9needed me once upon a time, or who make me laugh, or come through for me as a true friend whenever I need one. They would have been my friends even if I had no idea what their sexual preference was, and I give them the respect of loving them because they are whole people…. not defined by any one flaw or asset; not simple, stupid, or evil. Just my friends and my family, the same as all  the rest of them whose sexual preferences are also none of my business!!

That’s my take on all of this, for what it is worth. I love you, my patchwork quilt of family and friends. Thank you for loving me back. 🙂


~ Bird



11 responses to “Rainbows: It Ain’t Just About Skittles Anymore”

  1. I’d say I identify mostly with Christianity, because that’s what I know best, but I do look into other religions. The way gay people are treated in churches can be crushing. I’ve left two churches in my life, not by choice, by force. I personally do not have to attend a church, but I wish the would look around their congregation and take into consideration that their’s more than likely a few gay people, and children around that might end up being gay before they attack us in a sermon.

    I just wanted to raise my kids in a church cummunity the second time, but no. I can’t attend, or particapate because of my ‘life style’ even though they told me to come as I was and they’d accept me.
    Anyways, I’m pleased, and surprised by the new law. I’ll hop off your blog now 😉

    Liked by 1 person

    • Hi, Aaron! Thank you for sharing your own experience with us. Sadly, I’m a Christian that also feels unwelcome in church, although for other reasons. Teach up your children… That was for us parents, and you don’t need the church to do that part right!

      Liked by 1 person

      • I’ve done a lot of bible stories for bedtime just so they kinda get some knowledge of it, and I have friends for fellowship, it’s really only my 12 year old who (mostly) understands what happened.

        Liked by 1 person

  2. I feel it is best to not ‘over-talk’ about this issue… but when someone does, and you have the choice to take the safe route and just nod your head and say nothing, or actually say what you believe .. it’s a tough decision. There are as many people bashing Christians for not loving gays, if they disagree with the supreme court decision .. as there are people bashing gays. I may disagree with the decision, but I also don’t agree

    with churches centering out gays for judgment more than any other sin…. I noticed there are many Christians who are saying it’s a good decision because to not do so, is interpreted as being anti-gay…

    So much confusion!…. All we need in my humble opinion is to remember is to love as God instructed us to do… and to let Him do the judging Diane…

    Liked by 1 person

  3. Nicely put Bird. I have to say much of the world cheered this week when the law was passed. I’m sure no-one is naive enough to believe that all the problems are over though.
    I’m not a Christian though I have many friends who are, and many people who know better than to bring Christianity and it’s priests up as a subject since they pontificate in Churches and sin in private.
    I have gay friends too and some are the type who would be there in a flash if I had problems, so who am I to judge them.
    People are people and very complicated beings. Much better to judge people for their actions towards others in kindness and understanding than by the sexual partners they have. All are entitled to a chance at happiness.
    You’re a nice lady Bird.
    xxx Huge Hugs xxx

    Liked by 1 person

  4. Good one, Bird. You know, I find myself in a quandary over this one. It’s almost as if I’m schizophrenic, or operating in two domains at the same time. On the one hand, in the chaotic mess that is My Life, I really don’t care about homosexuality, any more than any other sin. Like you, I’m glad people don’t legislate what MY assortment of problems happen to be, I’d come out on the short end of the stick for sure.
    On the other hand, I have operated an overtly Christian, clearly delineated Christian preschool for years. People get our mission statement as part of their admission tour. No one is holding a gun to anyone’s head to come to my school, we accept no tax money, we are not even tax exempt.
    I can see pretty clearly now that religious liberty and gay rights are on a collision course. Do I get to operate my Christian school and practice the beliefs that I have held for decades, or do gay folks get to sue me for discrimination?
    To be clear, I am talking about hiring practices. I serve gay parents the same as I do straight ones. In that context, the only thing I get to judge is whether or not they are meeting the needs of their kids.
    But I can’t in good conscience hire a gay teacher. The Bible doesn’t support homosexuality, and I’m bound by Scripture. Inevitably, a four year old will see Miss Smith in the supermarket, and Miss Smith will introduce her partner to the child, and my client parents will feel as though I’ve betrayed their trust.
    Whooooo. This is a toughie. Love to hear your thoughts.
    XOXO -V

    Liked by 2 people

    • I can see your problem, being a business owner.

      Here’s the thing. Business is business, and good business shouldn’t be personal. You’re right. You operate a school that has incorporated Christianity into its foundation. As such, you can’t hire anyone living a lifestyle that is not in line with the Lord’s word. If people don’t like it, too bad. Business is business. As long as you don’t turn away gay parents, I’m thinking you are doing the right thing.

      Where do we draw the line? For me, it has to do with the condition of the heart. For instance, how many drug addicts teach in our school systems? I’m betting more than we would feel comfortable knowing. But for the most part, they keep their struggles as private as possible. They are sinning, same as the rest of us, but they are not trying to make people accept what they are doing as okay, or specifically, okay with God.
      That being said, the time is coming when you’re right. We won’t be allowed to live by Christian principles so far as they clash with what the law dictates is acceptable. It’s going to be very hard to separate out loving the sinners but hating the sin because any resistance on our part will be misconstrued as hatred.
      Lastly, you can legislate morality, and it was a mistake for the Supreme Court to think they could. This is a slippery slope decision, opening the door for too many questions about what should the correct amount of affection get us. If a woman wants to marry a pet, or a tree, and more than one man, and we are going to determine their right to marry based on affection, where does it stop? The truth is, God created this thing we call marriage, and He is the only one who genuinely decides who is eligible, and who is just spinning their wheels. It gives me some comfort to leave this mess to Him to decide.

      Love you, Vic. Come to Oklahoma. We have too big a drug problem to waste too much of an effort trying to fix anything else!!!


  5. Very eloquently put. I feel the same way, and I have been trying to put my feelings into words, because I feel a need to do so. I have not come up with anything I want to ‘put out there’ yet, and maybe I never will, but for now, I’ll keep trying to formulate my feelings and put it into words.

    Liked by 1 person

  6. If I would have thought more before I jumped defensively onto the automatic bible thumping wagon ….I would have hurt people I love less. My response would have looked more like this one. Bird this is exactly how I feel. Its like you bluetoothed my inner thoughts. Great elegance and now I wanna see you dance. Like no one is watching or reading. Lol.

    Liked by 1 person

  7. Reblogged this on dan4kent and commented:
    Here’s a non-hysterical take from different perspective than mine. I’ve written before at some depth about the gaps in translation in many bible versions, but that’s not my focus this morning as I ride the train into the city. What I hear Bird saying is the same thing all great teachers teach. “All you (we) need is Love. ”
    Peace my Friend.
    Until Then.


  8. “if I only loved people who were living lives in line with God, I would be the loneliest hypocrite on the face of the earth.” I might have said amen out loud in a retail store when I read that quote…

    Liked by 1 person

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