I Know Exactly Who My Enemy Really Is

Soldier On
Soldier On (Photo credit: Wikipedia)

Today, Sara at Kyllingsara wrote a brutally honest post about me, jealousy, Jesus, and forgiveness. It was, to me, one of the most beautiful posts I’ve ever read. And, as I was sitting here thinking, I thought I’d put a few of my own thoughts down about what this, and the rest of the circus that is going on in my life, really looks like to me.

I really rarely get angry at people. It takes a real maliciousness to bring out that emotion in me, and this is an almost 180 degree change from how I was when I was young. I can remember the moment when I came to realize just who my enemy in this life is…and it was never a human. It was satan.

I am not boasting when I say that I am a very dangerous person to satan’s plans and ambitions, and frankly, some of that was his own fault. I’ve been cauterised emotionally at a really early age, and I’ve literally emotionally, and in some cases physically, been rejected by all the people I’ve loved the most. I have been neglected by those that God gave me as my protectors, and I’ve been my own worst enemy. And through the pain, I’ve only gotten stronger and stronger, because logic dictates to me that satan wouldn’t bother to try so very hard to get rid of me once and for all if I weren’t a problem for him.

I have surrendered completely to Jesus, and as my Shame post indicates, I’ll be obedient even when I don’t want to be. I know I am perceived by the academic atheists, agnostics, and even some of the Christians as simple, naive..silly, as Sara says, but that is when I have to laugh. I am none of these things. Because of Jesus, I am strong, intelligent, still silly sometimes, but also extremely dangerous to the kingdom of hell, but not to other people. People are never my enemies, because most of the time, I can see those familiar fingerprints of satan’s on the situation, and it really was no different in this case with Sara either. I knew when she began to ask spiritual questions, satan would try to remove me from her quickly. So, no. I’m not surprised. I didn’t know what was going on, but I had noticed the distance, and I knew that what I had figured satan would do, he was doing. I am surprised and relieved that Sara rejected his lies…She’s a lot stronger than she thinks. Should she ever join us in our war, she’ll be a general, and twice as dangerous to the kingdom of hell as I am.

The more I search out and surrender to the Lord’s will in my life, I will become even more dangerous. I always know when I’m travelling down the right road…it is always just littered with sniper fire from the enemy. Frankly, I know I’m exactly where I am supposed to be at this point in my life, because I am standing smack in the middle of the Valley of the Shadow of Death. And Jesus is right here next to me. 🙂

I love you, Sara. Cut yourself a break. I knew all along my old enemy wasn’t going to lie passively by about you.

— Bird

 

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77 responses to “I Know Exactly Who My Enemy Really Is”

  4. You are so right…those who are no threat to the enemy, he will leave alone. Its those of us seeking to know and serve God who seem sometimes to be coming under attack so often, and so hard. But we know who wins! 🙂 You’re an awesome daughter of God! You win, because he that is in you has already won!! 🙂 Blessings –Anne

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  5. Thank you for putting my feelings into words. I knew what it felt like, but I didn’t know how to express it. I am not exaggerating when I say that almost every day of the last two months have been like running through a gauntlet. I have been under attack as never before and I find a strange comfort in the fact that I am exactly where I belong. Again, I thank you.

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    • I think we are designed to be warriors down here, and so there is a peace that comes from being where you are supposed to be, doing what you are supposed to be doing, and knowing that this war for each of us will one day be done. Thank you for your beautiful comment!

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  6. Well said, Bird. I so enjoy your writing. You’re good at it, girl. Ever think about writing for publication – newspaper, magazine, or perhaps a niovel. I encourage you to consider it. You’re talented!

    God bless. Keep ’em coming’. And stay Real!

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    • Thank you!! I love to write. if I could actually make money from it, I would love to.. But I have no idea how to break into stuff like that. I really appreciate this ego-boosting encouragement!!

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  8. Bird…you aren’t naive…remember the Bible says we have to come to Jesus like children, with an open faith that allows him to work in you and through you. My mom used to say…being a Christian doesn’t mean you willingly accept everything, but that you wait for the Lord to help you discern the truth. Resting in the Lord, and letting him guide us is often seen as being naive by those who don’t know Jesus as their Savior, only because they don’t understand, or can’t comprehend what a relationship with Jesus means for us. Keep being the Bird who waits on the Lord…remember Isaiah 40:31. We both know what Sara is going through, from our own experience, and that is why God has put you and I together with her…to help, pray, and share those steps she is going through, and most of all to be understanding when she needs it.

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    • Jesus told us to become like little children. What I interpreted this to say was, Keep it simple, Stupid… 🙂 I don’t feel naive or stupid. lol..maybe that is a mistaken perception on my part, but I don’t think so. In a society that worships education with the person who can confuse the most people being crowned the king, my approach is not enviable. But it is biblical, and that is what I am aiming for.

      Thank you for your encouragement…as usual!! You are a wonderful friend!

      — Bird

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      • LOL…I don’t think I meant or God means “keep it simple stupid”. LOL! But if you look at who he used in the Bible for the most part they were not learned men, but simple men who accepted him with the faith of a child. That is faith, like when our children so readily accept what we tell them as true. When I was a child I didn’t question the Bible…but as a “learned” teen I questioned everything, even the intelligence of my parents. Now I realize I was smarter at the age of 4 then I was after the age of 13 and began to think I was the smartest thing on earth. That is when Satan introduced me to his minions “doubt” and “ego”. God put those words in the Bible so we would have direction to handle things, and his counsel when we needed it. The way I figure it…he knew what he was doing when he created everything, and he sees everything, so who am I to question whether his way is right or wrong. He hasn’t steered me wrong so far, and I know if you are approaching things Biblically, he isn’t going to steer you wrong either.

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  9. I actually really needed this today. I believe this is the case with many of those that I love, and myself included. I need to remember that if Satan chooses to work so hard on me, then I must be a great tool for the Lord.

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  11. I am trying to catch up on my reading and failing at it in an epic way. I have gotten to a few spots but not many. Love you Bird and I think about you always… The Lord is my Sheppard, I shall not want… He is carrying me right now.

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    • He’s carrying me, too! And I am so far behind on my reading, it’ll take a month to catch back up…Love you, too, girl. Thanks for keeping in touch with me!

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  12. okay I may become really unpopular about now but please read the full message lol. I am not a christian as one of my friends refers to me i am one of those tree hugging heathens a pagan. But i still love reading your posts and strangely enough when it comes to beliefs we have much in common. whatever a persons personal beliefs there seem to be so many people out there telling you you aren’t a proper (fill in your own belief) if you dont do this, you dont do that. I believe we all have our own paths to travel to reach understanding, you can be guided, advised but to get there you must follow your own path. The world would be a better place if most of thses people concentrated on their own paths and worried less about trying to force others down it with them. I believe tolerance is the key to a better world I would never judge anyone on on their beliefs I judge on their actions and their heart Hopefully you will still ilke my stuff enough to keep following me. right time to go dance naked in the woods and do a few laps of the neighbourhood on my broomstick (only joking)

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    • I will still come see your site. I am not offended by other people having a different opinion than me, or even disagreeing with me completely. I always talk from a spiritual viewpoint because I sincerely believe in all of this, and according to my beliefs, my existence here on earth is to bring more souls into God’s kingdom. Since I believe that, I am actually trying to do that, because I believe in heaven and hell, and I don’t want people around me going to hell. That being said, people were given a free-will and they have the right to exercise it.
      I don’t force what I believe down anyone’s throat. I only offer advice to specific people when I am specifically asked to, like Sara did. Now, do you guys dance naked in the woods only on full moons, or will any part of the lunar cycle work? lol!!

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      • new moons, full moon we will moon at any moon lol I wasnt suggesting you were doing any forcing was reflecting on your own experiences you had mentioned aswell, my main objection in that line is those smiley mormons who knock on your door and always seem to call at the most inconvenient moments lol

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        • Are you kidding me? I love it when they knock on my door! Them, and the Jehovah’s Witnesses. The JW’s actually kept sending different people to my house for a few months until I was finally written off as an infidel. I know my bible… 🙂

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          • It was a bit awkward at one point when my daughter was in school one of the JWs that used to come round was actually her maths teacher so I asked him to actually explain logicstically how noah managed to singled handedly construct an ark big enough to carry not only the animals but all the supplies needed to feed and care for all the animals and how he could take care of them all without them eating each other. gave me three weeks peace and quiet until he thought up an answer and came back

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            • lol..I studied both of those religions when I was searching for God, and I have re-acquainted myself with them again recently. Never hurts to know what people believe..

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  13. I love your attitude Bird! Sometimes I think when the devil is accusing us of things God says, “Have you noticed my faithful servant…” (insert your name) And that’s when we notice the snipers you wrote about. We must forgive like Job did. I had to learn this when my son was molested years ago and then again when he was killed by a drunk driver. I remember a time when I thought about giving up and God spoke to me though Tom Hanks in his movie, “A League of Their Own”. There was a scene where one of the girls wanted to quit because it was too hard and Tom Hanks responded, “Of course it’s hard! It’s supposed to be hard! If it was easy everyone would be doing it!” Since then I have determined to be, like you, a very dangerous person to Satan’s plans.

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    • First, let me say how sorry I am that the devil has taken so much from you. Reading about your son broke my heart. My own son has severe Type 1 diabetes, and while it most definitely isn’t the same as your grief, I have a fear sometimes of losing him too early.
      I remember when, as a young adult, I actually saw so crystal clearly how every time a fork in the road of my life showed up, satan was always there trying to throw me off track. Oh, and I’ve gone down those wrong paths so many times, and paid a price each time. I took all that anger, pain, hatred and directed it silently towards the author of pain. I don’t rant or rail, call him names, and I very much have an enemy’s regard for his ability, but I am always watching out for his next attack. It also helped me to forgive the people I needed to forgive. I now have a real appreciation for the immense power forgiveness wields…Slow to anger, quick to forgive. Anyways, you are getting the last of my ambien-soaked brain this morning…sorry for the ramblings! And thank you for your thoughtful comment!

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  14. Have you ever read Waking the Dead by John Eldredge? It was quite an eye-opener for me about the ways the enemy will attack us – how he uses others around us (even other Christians sometimes) to fire those darts where we are vulnerable, about how we make agreements with the enemy, etc.

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    • No, but I would love to check it out. I remember reading two books that kind of put this all in perspective for me…well, three if we count the Bible..They were Pigs in the Parlor..I didn’t agree with some stuff in it, but it did give a kind of face to my enemy in my head, and the other was The Miracle of the Scarlet Thread. I’m getting pretty good at guessing anymore where the attack is going to come from next..years of experience. Well, that and a hyper vigilant mind.. 🙂 Sometimes they are unexpected, but not usually. There is something rather confirming about knowing you are upsetting satan’s apple cart… Thanks for the sharing..

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  17. What a wonderful testimony! Keeping things simple absolutely does not make one simple. When it comes to our Christian Walk, Overly complicating things distracts us from maintaining line of sight between our roles as Christians and the purpose Jesus gave us when, through the Holy Spirit, He established the universal church.

    Shalom, Art

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    • Thank you, Art. I find a stability in things that are simple..The more complicated an argument, the easier it is for satan to slip in a tiny twist that can change the meaning entirely. 🙂

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  18. My Granddaddy Raeford used to say that if the devil wasn’t bothering you, you’d better check on what you’re doing for the Lord — because it’s probably not much. Another great reminder, Bird. Sandy

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    • I agree with your Granddaddy Raeford!! To me, it is the only logical conclusion…This is war time..something should be shooting at you!!

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  19. Dear Bird – I just backtracked and caught up on your weekend blogs. You wrote some very intense and important stuff so I’m glad I did. And I agree, you are so very dangerous to Satan. The fact that you turn your pain into blessing and beauty does incredible damage to the enemy. You strengthen my faith. I am blessed and honored to know you, and glad to be on the same side as you. (I’d hate to be on the wrong side of you – yikes!)

    You are loved – you are blessed – you are a blessing. Keep going strong for Jesus the Lord and Christ sister! Vince

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    • Thanks for that, Vince. I was hoping it didn’t sound prideful..just matter of fact. After reading so many blogs by so many people, I was starting to get concerned that the impression we give non-Christians is a weak one, or that if we are stumbling through our lives, we just weren’t measuring up like other “good” Christians. To me, this is just the way it is.. You always make me feel like this soul-baring is worth something. Thank you!

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    • I agree, we do serve an amazing God. Even more exciting to me is that He wins this whole war… 🙂 Thank you for checking out my site!

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  22. I would be remiss if I didn’t comment to this. I wasn’t healed until I embraced Satan as one of God’s children and came to Love him as well. One of the Lord’s fallen angels – much like we are. He doesn’t bother us much any more (Satan, that is) because he has become one of ‘our brothers’. Took that to end the war in me.

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    • I’m going to respectfully disagree with your position. First, people are not fallen angels. We are humans, and we are not going to die and go to heaven as angels. Second, I hate satan. I hate everything satan does. I hate everything that satan tries to destroy and everything he represents. Most importantly, Satan is waging this entire war against Jesus, who I love. I would never insult my friend by embracing his enemy. Satan is anti-Christian and anti-human. He hates you and he hates me. You can’t “love” or “embrace” him back into the family…My guess is that he leaves you alone because you are actually being tricked, by him, into a position that renders you ineffective to the kingdom of God. Why bother harassing someone when they aren’t dangerous at all? Or even worse, actually working for the enemy to further the enemy agenda? Sorry. Just can’t embrace this reasoning at all…

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      • But you see – I forgive him all that. Everything. I have no hatred towards him at all, though I used to — which lead to a lot of self-hate, doubt, etc. All man’s evils. It wasn’t until I figured it all out that I could actually be at peace with myself – and him and God. And (wry smile) – if you want to believe, just look up my references about my trip to Puerto Rico. I had a really strange experience there last year; sorta kidnapped, held captive; lost 35 pounds in 14 days; walked 3 days . . . lots of things. And it was the happiest week of my life – I met God, talked to Him; he showed me a lot of things. Jesus Christ is just one of them.
        The truth is: we are all God’s children – and more. There is a truth out there that . . . well, you’ll see. I’m not into pushing my beliefs at all; not if you don’t want to hear them – and I feel if you are comfortable in your belief and system – are happy with joy – that’s good. I don’t want to disturb that. But anger is not happiness at all; neither is hate. Those are the wrong kinds of emotions to feel – even towards someone as bad as Satan. I feel only pity and sympathy for him; I have seen his side. But he’s okay with me and I with him – and he doesn’t bother tempting me anymore. Doesn’t do any good.

        You know that old Christian saying? “Hate the sin, not the Sinner”. Well, ditto the same thing towards Satan. That’s not to say I don’t get angry about – well, a lot. But a lot of what I get angry about is human stupidity; not something Satan is doing. People have a choice – and it’s up to them to make it. Deep in their hearts they know right from wrong – and if some of them pay some kind of penalty in the end? (shrug) Well, I don’t believe in an eternal hell, either; I don’t believe God is that way – I’m thinking He’s a lot wiser than that. He’s just gonna keep Teaching us some lessons – until we finally learn. Get your lessons down right and maybe you got a chance to go on to “heaven”; otherwise you’re just doomed to keep repeating them until you get ’em down. But I think God loves his children – every one of us, all life forms – way too much to do that.

        Then there’s the thing: God created us in his own image – inside. Soo . . . take a look ‘inside’ . . . and you can see God. He’s a lot like us (in my opinion) and free will was given just to see what we’d do with it. I don’t think he “knows everything” – not about people. It’s his form of entertainment to kinda keep things interesting. After all: everything else is predictable; at least the mathematics are. Billard balls all bounce the same. However, this “free choice” thing – kinda adds a dice in the equation, don’t you think? “He” (our living God) . . . well, he’s got a wry sense of humor, I think – making us make the decision ourselves – and sometimes between ‘two wrongs’ (which way will you go?) . . .

        I do know this: my “God” is not some static god who stands like a frozen statue in the universe. He’s a dynamic humorous being full of love, humor, and ‘being good’ – but he gives ‘us’ the choice – and the Devil is just there to tempt us. The rest? Nature and things. Physics, and what ‘we’ve’ done to the planet. Just a natural course, written in the rocks and stones much as the dinosaurs are.

        Love and forgiveness is what it’s all about I seem to recall someone saying – maybe it was Jesus Christ? Or was it God? Never mind; they are both one and the same and ‘my’ religion leaves me feeling good all over (truly and physically right here – a nice and tingly feeling thinking about it) – and is like a brightly singing light inside.

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  24. As you know, I’m still very undecided as to where I stand when it comes to faith and religion, but I do so LOVE everything you write, particularly about this topic. It’s all so enlightening.
    I know exactly who my real enemy is (and has always been), and that’s me.

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    • lol…My main enemy is satan, but I make my own self miserable all the time! Thank for always sharing your thoughts with me. I love everything you write too. You are really talented, and your mind is very deep. Your brain is an ocean of endless depths compared to my river that is always moving… :-). I love the deep things you make me ponder…

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      • OMG are you kidding me? My brain is a rambling mess of half formed thoughts whereas you start with an idea, stay focused on that idea and see it through to the end. Oh, if only I had that kind of focus!!!
        It is great though that we’re both able to make each other ponder… pondering is good!

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  25. Love it, Bird. Well said, girl! (And a truly fab response to Satan as Jesus’ brother.) I admire your ability to reason and speak up when someone throws mixed up theology your way. Keep writing!

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  28. Bird-I found this post through Katharine T’s re-blog. I am so glad I did, because your post today was perfect for my heart. I loved your closing line about standing in the Valley of Death with Jesus beside you. What a terrific message for us all to hear today. thanks

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  29. I’m still learning from you, while I’m making my way to the top as well. I certainly love reading everything that is posted on your site.Keep the aarticles coming. I enjoyed it!

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